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Stall Scrawls - Bathroom Wall Quotes    
One of the last untapped (and overlooked) sources of poetry is the stuff found on the stalls of the local bathroom. Sure, we've seen the usual crap, like "Call Betsy for a good time" or "My penis is huge" but occasionally while dropping the kids off at the pool we've seen genius at work. Perhaps even you have taken the time to write something creative, share it with us. Either way, read our user submitted collection of bathroom wall quotes from around the world. TurdWords.com Stall Scrawl
At TurdWords.Com, we've given you the opportunity to gain wisdom from the scrawlings of other scatalogically inclined people, such as yourself. Check out what your fellow visitors have recorded below or feel free to submit one of your own.

Showing 1-25 of 199 [ Next 25 >> ]

Find who you've been looking for

If you sprinkle while you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie

Submitted by: Sheila Added: 2/1/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (6636 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Workplace Crapper

No matter how you squeeze and dance, the last few drops go down your pants

Submitted by: WaxWorm Added: 2/1/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (4340 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Common

Here I sit, in the hall of vapors.
Some darn fool done stole the papers.
The bell has rung I must not linger.
Look out ass cuz here comes my finger.

Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/1/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3381 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: KMart Crapper

Old Mother Hubbard
went to the cupboard
to fetch her dog a bone

When she bent over,
then Rover took over
cuz he had a bone of his own

Submitted by: Arizona Ron Added: 2/1/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3454 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: 12th Street & Vine, Kansas City

Pity those whose poetic wit Is inspired only by the smell of shit

Submitted by: Ross Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3359 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: outhouse at local state park

Here I sit, brokenhearted
Came to shit, but only farted

Submitted by: Ross Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3251 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Barnes & Noble

I have a soul mate
Who doesn't exist.
You've never touched me
We've never kissed."

Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3234 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Lake Geneva, WI

Don't laugh, it's God's joke!
Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3214 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Above the mirror in a club bathroom, Japan

Excuse me while I stop and think,
"I wonder why my urine's pink?"
Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3389 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Miami, FL

Don't read this, the joke is in your hand.
Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3227 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Above urinal

I fucked in France,
I fucked in Spain.
I fucked up and down
the coast of Maine.

But I'll never be happy
I'll never be free.
Till I fucked the Navy
like the Navy fucked me

Submitted by: Billy Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3146 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: New Jersey

Ode On A Toilet Paper Roll

If you picked this up to read
then I planted just the right seed.
Your curiosity got the better of you,
I just wanted something to do.

Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3203 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Washington D.C

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Ah, my friend, I've struck again but I've nothing important to say,

The sun is out and I am about to go home and have a great day!

Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3223 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Lake in the Hills, IL

The bathroom poet strikes again,
these empty rolls just tempt my pen.
You'll never know when I'll come through to leave a poem made just for you.
Submitted by: RJ Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3103 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Crystal Lake, IL

Upon this great, white throne I sit
trying hard to take a shit.
Now I leave here so broken hearted,
I had to shit but only farted.
Submitted by: Adam Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3115 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Ceasars Palace Hotel, Las Vegas

There once was a boy from Peru
Who fell asleep in his canoe
While dreaming of Venus, he tickled his penis
.....and woke up with a hand full of goo.

Found at: Construction site porta-potty

Submitted by: HeyJoe Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3183 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!

There once was a woman from Wheeling
Who had a peculiar feeling....
She laid on her back, and tickled her crack
and pissed all over the ceiling!
Submitted by: HeyJoe Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3132 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: construction site porta-potty

There once was a man from Madrass
Whose balls were constructed of brass
He'd go for a walk, they'd play stormy weather
.....and lightning would shoot out of his ass!
Submitted by: HeyJoe Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3273 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: construction site porta-potty

There once was man from Nantucket,
Whose dick was so long, he could suck it!
He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin...
"If my ear were a cunt, I would fuck it!"
Submitted by: HeyJoe Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3828 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: construction site porta-potty

Flush twice....it's a long way to the cafeteria.
Submitted by: HeyJoe Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (6646 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: University of Wisconsin men's room.

Q: Is diarrhea hereditary?

A: Yes. It runs in your jeans! (genes)

Found at: School bathroom

Submitted by: HeyJoe Added: 2/3/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3747 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!

Those who write on bathroom walls,
roll their shit into little balls. Those who read these words of wit eat those little balls of shit.

Reply:
The person that thinks he writes of wit, has fingers that smell like little balls of shit!

Submitted by: ralph Added: 2/4/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3187 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Sea World Bathroom

You can shake it, you can squeeze it, you can bang it against the wall.
But you've gotta get it back in your pants for the last Goddamned drop to fall.
Submitted by: ¤¿¤ §oûpBôNë ¤¿¤ Added: 2/4/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3906 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Hustler Magazine circa 1979

Some come here to sit and think
Others come here to shit and stink
But I come here to scratch my balls
And read the bullshit on the walls
Submitted by: pleed Added: 2/5/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (5738 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: Public Toilet in Australia

Please don't eat urinal mint

Submitted by: justin Added: 2/5/2003 Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star Stall Scrawl Star (3906 votes) Vote:   This is great! This sucks!
Found At: resterant

Showing 1-25 of 199 [ Next 25 >> ]

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