Stall Scrawls - Bathroom Wall Quotes
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One of the last untapped (and overlooked) sources of poetry is the stuff found on the stalls of the local bathroom. Sure, we've seen the usual crap, like "Call Betsy for a good time" or "My penis is huge" but occasionally while dropping the kids off at the pool we've seen genius at work. Perhaps even you have taken the time to write something creative, share it with us. Either way, read our user submitted collection of bathroom wall quotes from around the world. |
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At TurdWords.Com, we've given you the opportunity to gain wisdom from the scrawlings of other scatalogically inclined people, such as yourself. Check out what your fellow visitors have recorded below or feel free to submit one of your own. |
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Showing 26-50 of 199
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Are You Getting All You Can Out of Sex?
Take this short quiz and find out.
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Your big john is not as big as you think
it is, please step closer to urinal
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Submitted by: justin
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Added: 2/5/2003
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(1893 votes)
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Vote:
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Found At: resterant
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Whale oil beef hooked. (It's the sound not the meaning we're looking for here)
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Submitted by: Ezekiel Bullwinkel
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Added: 2/6/2003
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(1839 votes)
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Found At: Dagenham, Essex County, UK.
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here i sit broken hearted
paid a dime and only farted
next time, i'll take a chance
save a dime and shit my pants
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Submitted by: darin
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Added: 2/6/2003
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(5296 votes)
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Found At: toliet in store with paid stalls
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Shake it more than twice, it's masturbation. Found at: College Urinal
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Submitted by: Free
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Added: 2/7/2003
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(3051 votes)
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Sitting on the toilet stool
trying to doo-doo,
Waiting on my bowels to move
trying to doo-doo,
I just can't take it
My butt keeps shaking
Sitting on the toilet stool
trying to doo-doo
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Submitted by: Xavier
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Added: 2/7/2003
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(1784 votes)
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Found At: Office building stall
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I woke up this morning and i could hardly wait to ponder out my window and gaze at my estate the breeze was blowing briskly it made the flowers sway my garden was enchanting on that inspiring day. my eyes fell on a little bird with a beautiful yellow bill i beckoned him to come enlight upon my windowsil. I smiled at him with happiness and gave him a crust of bread then quickly closed the window and smashed his fucking head
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Submitted by: Jordan
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Added: 2/9/2003
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(1703 votes)
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Found At: MJHS
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When you sit here tryin to drop a bomb Be thankfull the cum stain is gone
cuz in this very stall me and my bitch got it on
you were lookin forward to your shittin time and i had to foil it
but if i were you i wouldnt flush the toilet
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Submitted by: mason
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Added: 2/11/2003
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(1694 votes)
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Found At: wrote in the bathroom at windsor high
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Here I sit all broken hearted,
tried to Poop but only farted.
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Submitted by: VaderMan
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Added: 2/12/2003
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(1752 votes)
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Found At: my house
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So this is where all the dicks hang out!
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Submitted by: Slooky
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Added: 2/12/2003
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(1828 votes)
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Found At: Above a urinal un Charlottetown
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Sweetie, that wasn't a hotdog you ate... Found at: resturant
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Submitted by: queenofwands
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Added: 2/12/2003
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(1733 votes)
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Yes, I DID sleep with your boyfriend!
And,yes, the sex was great!
Before you two go on the mend...
Hey! My period's late!
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Submitted by: queenofwands
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Added: 2/12/2003
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(1724 votes)
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Found At: resturant
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I'll bet my monkey can spank your monkey....
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Submitted by: queenofwands
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Added: 2/12/2003
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(1733 votes)
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Found At: bar
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Do you like Big Boobs? These hefty's are looking for you.
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Turds longer than 4 inches must be hand-lowered due to back-splash.
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Submitted by: Matt
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Added: 2/12/2003
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(1759 votes)
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Found At: Port-A-Potty
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Q: What do women and airplanes both have in common?
A: They both have "cockpits".
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Submitted by: HeyJoe
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Added: 2/13/2003
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(1714 votes)
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Found At: School bathroom
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Q: What do Michael Jackson and Wal-Mart both have in common?
A: They both have little boys pants half-off.
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Submitted by: HeyJoe
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Added: 2/13/2003
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(1800 votes)
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Found At: construction site porta-potty
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Anybody can pee on the floor, be a man and shit on the ceiling.
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Submitted by: badwiper
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Added: 2/17/2003
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(1734 votes)
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Found At: in front of a urinal
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There was a young man of Kent,
Who's nudger was terribly bent,
so to save time and trouble
he shoved it in doubled and
instead of cumming he WENT!!
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Submitted by: Frank (Taffo )
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Added: 2/26/2003
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(1759 votes)
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Found At: GENTSat The Bell in Bristol
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When this noble hall you enter
to dispose of what you eat,
please try to put it in the center,
and not all round the FUCKING SEAT !!!
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Submitted by: Frank (Taffo )
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Added: 2/26/2003
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(2421 votes)
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Found At: R.A. Barracks (SHEERNESS)
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Sitting on the toilet bowl
Stranded here without a roll
Should I take it like a man
Should I wipe it with my hand
Jesus Christ I need a plan
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Submitted by: rene and lance
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Added: 2/26/2003
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(1690 votes)
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Found At: penthouse
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Written on wall behind toilet: Look in the ceiling! (Arrow pointing upwards)
Written in the middle of the ceiling: Watch where you're peeing!
And sure as hell, my aim was a little off.
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Submitted by: Moonhawk
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Added: 2/27/2003
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(1645 votes)
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Found At: My old school
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No matter how you wiggle
And how you dance
The last two drops
Go in your pants
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Submitted by: DanTheManFromSudan
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Added: 3/5/2003
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(1643 votes)
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Found At: Stephen King book I think
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Here I sit, same as ever
Took a dump, pulled the lever
The toilet clogged, the water flowed
Look out world, it's a mother load!!!
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Submitted by: John
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Added: 3/11/2003
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(1799 votes)
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Found At: High school bathroom
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Standing in eternal bliss...
Listening to the rippling piss...
Now and then a splash is heard...
Of some far off falling turd...
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Submitted by: Beard
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Added: 3/11/2003
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(4706 votes)
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Found At: College dorm shitter
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We don't pee in your pool,
so please don't swim in our toilet.
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Submitted by: Gruunt
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Added: 3/12/2003
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(1798 votes)
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Found At: Comic Store bathroom
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You're drinking American beer? Cut out the middle man...piss in your glass and save a fortune.
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Submitted by: Chubby Checker
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Added: 3/17/2003
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(1626 votes)
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Found At: Above urinal in LONDON Pub
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Showing 26-50 of 199
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